So my good friend the ex-president Todd Hellinga found himself with a new gig this summer. As an avid forum poster on NSMB.com (something which I turn a blind eye to because he uses this power for good not bad, and he is a legend of a bloke) Cam McRae (NSMB Master of Ceremonies) asked…

Jordan Manley gets about. Here’s two photos of his that are currently gracing the home page of Santa Cruz Bikes website. Who is that in the photo? That’s right the same dude who once climbed out of the ceiling window of a bar took a shit on the balcony of a hotel and used his…

Dickheads…

As promised, more Gross out madness. So easy, so fun. Anyway, the above photo was from last mondays mega fun fest with four of my favourite riders/friends/jokers/totally not cool kids – Dylan Wolsky, Paulo Stevens, Kevin ‘Huck to Flat’ Landry, and Todd Hellaginger. There’s more awesome photos (my my, Todd is getting good) over on…

This photo is the cover of the next Giro catalogue. FACT! In front you can see World Singlespeed Champ Trannie Afro Zombie Schnell, and behind him is the zombie monster, Kurt Complain. Thanks to Colin Meagher for snapping this moment in undead history, Giro for believing in the need for equal rights for monster (truck…

This was sent to me by John Oldale from the Eurobike Guide. Boom! Still big in Germany after my appearance in German Womens Health Magazine last year. The caption with the photo is translated as “How did this technology adverse weener schnitzel get hold of a Carbon V-1o?”

So last week the legendary Whistler trail, Dirt Merchant reopened after a two week closure. The trail crew had loving spent alot of time fluffing and buffing and changing and fixing the trail. Then the morning of it’s grand reopening a small crew of us got to session it with Mason Mashon as photographer. The…

Squeezed in between bouts of nakedness and pure naked ambition, I have been doing alot of writing recently. The submission requests and assignments have been flooding in quicker than I can clear them. However, one request came in a week or so ago for some words about Chromag that would go up on Freehub Magazine…

Phat Wednesday Chainless A-Line Fancy Dress Race. I’ve won the fancy dress component of this race for two years previously so I had pressure to step up my game this year. Unfortunately with my hectic work schedule I had nothing this year…literally.

Message from Patrick Fallon: Congratulations! You are invited to become part of a very exclusive group… I meant to interview Mr Seb Kemp while I was in Whistler, but I was flat-out with work (by which I mean too lazy and disorganised to get round to it). So I have decided to ask all you…

I’ve been slow on the 2FLAT front but in the background I’ve been loading up the worlds media outlets with more of my filth, poor grammar and even worse speeling. Here is a round up of July and August content blitz from three magazines from around the global sphere-a-tron.

Karl Bensemann just opened up Private Distro which imports Blk Mrkt into Australia now. Karl started this because no one else was bringing them in and he loves riding his MOB. Karl is a working mans hero. Welds all day, digs in the evening, then digs and roasts all weekend. He is also a very…

During Crankworx I had the opportunity to get out of town and ride some alpine with All-Mountain legend, Ross Schnell. Colin Meagher was there to capture some moments.

Which way to the beach?

So this photo not only tickled the fancy of a slew of 14 year old boys for one day, but it worked as material enough to make it the “Mostest Orrible Porn” also know as POM. This goes to show a few critical things.

So last week I posted saying how rare it is to find someone able to take new photos or new angles of old photos in the Bike Park, well the very next day I met and had the pleasure of working with someone who could shoot the Park in very new and exciting ways. Deep…

Often I find that when you shred hard for the camera the resulting shot ends up not looking like the action in it was as rad as I imagined it would look. That’s not to take anything away from photogs, it’s probably A) my fault as a rider B) I have delusional tendencies.

This came via Todd Hellinga from one of his internet forum buddies. I think this must be equally damning as evidence for forum users having too much time on their hands, as it is for the creative genius behind it.

Been flat out working recently. If i’m not coaching then I’ve been trying to shoot photos or video with about everyone at the moment. Oh it’s a hard life and I bet your heart bleeds. Thing is I haven’t truly had anytime to ride for me recently. I’ve either been teaching the fundamentals of stance…

Todd Hellinga has had a POD week. The above shot is the second POD (that means Picture Of the Day for those still writing in proper english) he has had on that site in one week. This one is of yours truly taken at 7am on his 30th birthday killing a fresh berm in Silverstar.…

The summer of 2006. My wanderings had placed me in Whistler where I discovered the beauty and the beast of the Bike Park. I had just got myself a mountain bike again after a six year hiatus where I solely BMXed. It was a banging summer where I didn’t work, I lived in a house…

This is Ian. Ian is nine years old. Ian likes to mountain bike. Ian can ride Crank It Up, A-Line, and Dirt Merchant. Here is a photo of Ian dropping into Dirt Merchant.

Photographic evidence has surfaced of the Tallboy being sent off the GLC drop. This was during the 4QUEENS Day Two Garbo Stage. TO FLAT!!! Photo stolen from Tracey Howletts Facewaste page. Quick post today.

That’s right folks, super McGarry just got back from his euro gigolo mission and has crash landed in Whistler. Kelly McGarry is the nicest dude in mountain biking. He is also one of the biggest. And he is also very good at supersizing his riding. Kelly works very hard to follow his dream and sacrifices…

After last year, Race Dictator Drill Sergeant Tony Horn must of sat down and wondered why there weren’t more dead bodies lying around on the side of the course. In an attempt to remedy this he squeezed a whole extra stage into the four days which makes it a five stage race in four days.…

So, Day One of the four day super duper epic mega race, The Four Queens, is over. The first stage was the Westside Wheel up course which goes something like this: Mega hill straight out of the gate, the kind of hill that isn’t that long so you go HARD out the gate only to…

“Why do women fake orgasms? Because men fake fourplay.” “Four thirds of people don’t understand fractions.” Last weekend, whilst in Silverstar, I had the pleasure of getting to ride and hang out with one of mountain bikings most interesting characters. A man who on his business card simply has the title “Director of good times”…

I hate reviews, especially ones that appear on websites. They are all bullshit half truths that are aimed to pamper to potential advertising revenue. Rarely any truth, and more often than not websites just post the press releases which read like a day at a curtain factory. Boring…

So just got back from the winding road of out of town shredding. After Sunpeaks we turbo roosted it to Silverstar to catch up with the NSMB guys for the annual AIRprentice competition. If you aren’t familiar with the AIRprentice then simply put it’s a competition whereby NSMB select their next team guy. Over the…

On the road for a dirty weekend away with the boys. Ripping and shredding Sunpeaks and Silverstar bike parks, as well as any other random roadside schralping we can find. The above photo was taken outside of Lillooet at 8am. Thats right, we were freeriding for breakfast folks!

So this morning it turns out some of the shots from yesterdays shoot with Jordan Manley got posted on NSMB alongside a brief (and slightly inebriated) write up of NMSBs head honcho, Cam McRaes tims aboard the V-10.4. The above shot was used as the banner today. This must drive the NSMB forum wild. They…

A few random shots from the drive from Santa Cruz up to Whistler last week.

Whistler ,BC. 24th June 2010. I will remember this date for along time to come, and for two excellent reasons. Firstly, I got my grubby mitts on a Carbon V-10. Secondly, I had the opportunity to meet and work with uber photog dude, Jordan Manley.

I used to be funny, or at least that’s what I tell myself. I was probably even more deluded back then than I am nowadays. Each month I used to really try hard writing something that was really entertaining to read but still had a decent theme running through it. The featured column from around…

So I’m really busy still road tripping so updates and posts are hard to spend time doing. So here’s some more background files on my monthly column in Dirt Magazine, Whistler Diaries.

Sorry about this. I don’t want to start making a habit of posting random stuff I find on the internet. Just made me smile. I mean, Apple I-Phones can do anything. I need one.

It’s a slowly budding seed of necessity. You’ll know when it blooms…

The mountains I know are quiet. Often the loudest sounds are the those of the mountains of the mind. A deafening peace only rarely broken by the tumble of rock, wind scour, and the clatter of chain slap, tire roll, and brake squeal. The silence magnified by the mass of space between the peaks.

I’ve been meaning to fill you in on some of the fucked up Jamaican sexual customs. So here’s a little cultural insight into the ins and outs of the ins and outs.

More tropical fruit for you. This time a little soft moment about Hagley Gap, my current Jamaican refuge. 

So the April 2010 issue of ozzy ripper mag [R]evolution has hit the shelves. I’m pretty stoked because, as well as having a boatload of good content, I have loads of my writings and even a full page shirtless picture of me rooting my BB.

Caleb Smith makes a brave attempt at defending my sexuality on my behalf Check out the link HERE

    Last year, whilst working with Bike Magazine on The Bible, I got to meet a whole heap of really interesting, inspiring, and fun people. Amongst the super talent that came through BearBackBikings door that month, one guy really stood out and that guy was Anthony Smith.

So after five weeks here on the paradise island of Jamaica I finally found the cracks in the image, the flaws in the beauty, the shit under the finger nails.

Of course that title is just an attention grabber and there is no truth in it. It’s just a cheap trick that employes scatological means to get you to dive into this entry…